Taken. By England. - Football Baby Tee

Relationship status: taken. By eleven men in white and a back four that gives you palpitations.

It's serious. You've rearranged your whole summer around them, you defend them in the group chat, and not one of them knows your name. Perfect, actually.

Hard launch. No notes.

The bit that matters:

• Fitted micro-rib baby tee — clings like your emotional availability to this squad
• Buttery cotton blend, breathable through ninety minutes of stress
• Slogan in deep navy, our own St George's cross crest
• S–2XL